In the midst of my first Mother’s Day (oh, how I can’t express how long I’ve waited for this), I thought it would be fun to lament on all the things that have changed in these last 5 months. Turns out, I do some very different things now that I am of the mom variety…
Your Phone Battery Constantly Needs Charging
Everything is a photo op in those first few months, my camera currently takes up 11.91gb of space with no signs of slowing down. Cute memories aside, I find myself Googling EVERYTHING. My search history reads like many new moms would I am sure. You find everything from, “what is normal baby poop colour?” to “How much postpartum hair loss is normal?”. Inquiring minds need to know…
You’re in a Constant State of Rock
You pick up the “Mom-sway” really quick once you have a baby. Keep baby moving, and keep baby happy. I catch myself still swaying side to side in the grocery line without the baby. My body just does it now.
You Make Meals Out of One-Handed Food
Those early days made granola bars my best friends. Anything I could eat while feeding the baby a bottle, pumping or even in that 6 minutes she finally napped was necessary. I envy any Mom that has time to make herself a nutritious salad in those first few months. If you managed to make it AND eat it, then my hat’s off to you!
You Find Shopping For Clothes Postpartum Depressing
I lost the baby weight within 10 days (don’t curse me under your breath yet, I gained plenty back in the months following). Did this mean my existing clothes fit? Heck no. Trying on shirts in the store made me feel like I had lumps and bumps where I never did before. Clothing either fits me like a burlap sack or a sausage casing; There is no in between.
You Still Love Buying Clothes Though… Just in Size Tiny Human Size
There is something about buying baby clothes, even the impractical ones that have buttons in the wrong places. They are irresistible regardless of practicality. Much like my closet in my previous life, Everly has outfits she grew out of before wearing more than once.
You Notice That Sweet Ride…
It’s not the kind of wheels that you’re used to noticing though. Instead, you find yourself looking at the strollers being pushed everywhere. Let’s face it, you know how much those things cost! The other day I whispered to my Dad that the stroller that just rolled by was worth over $2000. Queue comment about how in his day things were different, kids walked to school uphill both ways and had one pair of shoes to last all year… yada yada yada.
You Make Potty Talk Dinner Conversation
Everly often naps right around the time we sit down for dinner. I can’t count how many times things like, “Did she poo today?” and “She spat up right down the back of my neck this morning” come up. This is our life now. We talk about number 1s, number 2s… and hopefully not number 3s (no, you don’t want to know).
Your Idea of Deep Sleep is…Wait, What is Deep Sleep?
Riddle me this, how is it that every little sneeze, grunt and fart wakes mom up immediately, regardless of how many walls between, yet Dad can sleep through it? It’s some sort of mom-phenomenon no doubt, and for the first 4 months I woke every time Everly even dreamed of stirring. Then, the day came to move her into her own room, and the baby monitor went on his side of the bed. As Ali Wong once said, “I have suffered enough”. (I still get up occasionally, but it’s easier to pretend I’m asleep long enough for Daddy to wake now – sssshhhh!)
What are your favourite, “You might be a mom when” moments? I’d love to hear them in the comments below!
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